Choosing your divorce support system is crucial in how you respond to this challenging process. The right attitude or frame of mind is influenced by a helpful and reliable support system. You do not want to surround yourself with negative, toxic people during a time where you are looking for support. There are five types of people whose perspective, insight, attitude, experiences, and background could inspire or discourage you during this trying time.
You can look up to the refreshing, inspiring and independent approach your single friends have on life. To them, life is a challenge that brings out the best in them. You can share the happiness and growth with your single friends, because being single does not equate to loneliness. Because they still need to process and have yet to actually experience the intensity and weight of the brutal emotions divorce is filled with, you may not get enough empathy and insight regarding your concerns from your single friends. Nonetheless, they may inspire you to do the work to process your transition to an independent, new life.
During divorce, these are the friends you can rely on for concrete and practical advice. Because you now have shared experiences, they can offer you emotional insight and support. This allows you to be better equipped to navigate not only the practical and legal aspects, but also the overwhelming emotional details and hang-ups during divorce. You might get a tip on a divorce lawyer or an expert financial analyst to consult. Apart from practical and emotional support, they are examples of divorce survivors, inspiring hope in you to stick to a sound game-plan and take care of yourself.
With married friends, you may be able to compare notes and make sense of how and why your marriage broke down or didn’t work out. You may receive tips and reminders on ways to please your future partner and how to nurture a relationship. They can show you real, down-to-earth love that binds and revitalizes or reinstates the desire for human connection, despite trials and conflicts. Depending on how you look at the situation, you might feel left out or entertain doubts and self-limitations, because your marriage failed. Or you might use their intact and thriving marriage as a way to cope with your sense of alienation upon witnessing a thriving love relationship or partnership.
Usually, youth is the time in one’s life when the sky’s the limit and everything seems possible. It is a time of hope, energy, and extreme, all-encompassing optimism. The mindset of younger people is to get back on their feet again and bounce right back. There is resilience coming from physical tenacity, but less emotional and practical insight on problems or issues. You can use a daily dose of optimism and zest for life from your younger friends and acquaintances. No judgments, only support and the excitement for the long journey ahead.
The Older Demographic
Older, or more experienced, people are full of wisdom and prudence. They can offer you unrivalled insight to harness the power of listening to your inner voice, learning from your experiences, and the price you have to pay for your missteps. Nonetheless, they balance regret with learning crucial and life-changing lessons. They will show you the big picture, emphasizing what matters during the golden years, what actually endures, and what to prioritize.